Date #37 & #38 - Looks vs. Personality: Why Can't I Just Have Both?

March 16, 2024

For this date I got invited to PlantHouse in Arlington, VA to a terrarium-making workshop. If you don’t know what that is… don’t be embarrassed because I didn’t either. It’s basically (in my best explanation) creating a tiny garden in a glass vase. I’ve never been a plant parent for the same reason I don’t want to be a tiny human parent: I don’t want to deal with the responsibility of keeping it alive. But this idea was very unique, very different; it has never been suggested to me and I didn’t even think it was a thing. So for a guy to introduce me to something I didn’t even know was in existence? Major points! Unfortunately, the minute we met up I knew it wasn’t going to last. He was one of those guys who was nice and sweet, also a bit straight-to-the-point, but no amount of niceness could make up for his looks. And I truly do feel bad about saying that.

We met up and his aura was different I will say. Not in a good way but not in a bad way either. The whole time it felt very much like we both weren’t into each other on a romantic level but was going to make the most of our time with the other.

He is a plant dad so he does this on a regular as opposed to me still trying to figure everything out. We arrived, and first things first was to pick out our vase. Next you choose an air plant or another type of plant which is like cacti. One needs more care than the other so of course I chose the one that needed less care – a spritz of water once a week. Thought I could handle this but somehow they still died in 3 or so weeks…

Anywho, so after picking the vase and the plants you want, you then start decorating the inside with sand and rocks and other colorful fake plants and what not. It took me no time but he was really getting into his and it seemed he couldn’t concentrate on both a conversation and his terrarium so I just went around the shop taking pictures looking at the other plants they had. 

It was a fun time though, definitely something I’d do again. And then when we checked out I fell in love with this candle that he then bought for me so I’d count this as a green flag in the “gifts” section I had mentioned in the post before last.

Food wasn’t necessarily on the agenda but I guess we were having a decent enough time to where we were like why not grab something to eat. We went to Hank’s Oyster Bar which is right across the street. I’ve been to the Wharf location and wasn’t a huge fan but there weren't many options for us in the area so that’s what we decided.

It was pretty good conversation and we even agreed to try fried oysters which was a first for us both which has always been a green flag for me on dates – guys wanting to try something new with me, especially food! But my meal again was not the greatest.

After lunch he asked me for my number and we went our separate ways literally and figuratively. I think we were on the same page with the date because we did not talk again after that day except months later when I was asking different guys to give me a word or sentence to describe our date. He was still really nice and cool about it and said that he had a good time and it was a great way to start off spring. And I agree!

March 17, 2024

This was a busy weekend for me because the day after my date with #37 was my date with #38. And an hour before this date, I had met up with date #39 (which wasn’t an official date so his post will be after this one).

Now after a few average looking men, every now and then comes one really good looking one… and that’s who #38 was. I’m talkin I couldn’t contain my smile, blushing too hard, laughing at the joke that wasn’t even a joke type of good looking. And #39 was my type to a T too so seeing two fine men back to back same day? I wouldn’t even call it luck, I’d call it a deserve.

Ok enough about that… so my date with #38 was so damn far I’m talkin a good 40ish minutes north from where I currently was in Annapolis, MD, which made me about an hour and a half from my house. I met him at Ram’s Head Dockside in Glen Burnie, MD. It was a chill beachside bar & grill and anyone who knows me knows I love being around water despite it being cold. But being on a beach I had to order my fav – a pina colada. A gorgeous looking man, great views, sipping on a nice drink… honestly what more could I ask for?

Looks wise he had it. But personality wise? He gave very much nonchalant. And as someone who is goofy and jokey, I always feel the need to tone it down around those who are too calm and it’s an uncomfortable feeling for me. We did have a good conversation about friends and relationships, I took a few pics by the water, and then we sat in his car to talk a bit longer. Now anyone who reads my blog religiously already knows what I’m about to mention here: another parked car conversation! But, it was quiet and… maybe a little awkward? Like we ran out of things to talk about and we had barely scratched the surface. But then he said he was going to get going and of course I was disappointed because I wasn’t done looking at him. He drove me to my car and let me just emphasize this part people: he was the one who brought up a second date with me – asking if I wanted to hang out again and why wouldn’t I? I’ve mentioned a couple times before that I don’t like guys bringing up a second date while still on the first but I was really eager to go on a second date with him. He even asked for my number and all (remember, this is after I told guys I don’t give my number out until after the first date).

But we both left and… he did not hit me up after that. Now why waste my time even mentioning a second date to me? Got me all excited for nothin. We can laugh about it now but I was real life hurt over it lol. I mean not too hurt because for one he lived hella far and I didn’t want to date anyone that lived over an hour from me (how funny and ironic now, iykyk), and his nonchalant attitude wasn’t one I could see myself being around for long. Like I said we had a good conversation so I was willing to see him again, but this was one of those rare moments where I wanted a second date and they didn’t. He was the second of the only two guys I went on a date with that I was disappointed never led to a second date (this was mentioned back in Date #17).

Y'all might have your own opinions about this but honestly after the first date, I don’t text guys first just so I can kind of gauge how they felt about the date. I told yall he didn’t contact me, but I won’t lie… because I wanted to see him again, for the first time I actually hit him up first. He did say on the date that he was a bad texter and he preferred being on the phone and he definitely proved this after the fact. For me I have to work up to feeling comfortable talking on the phone but texting him his replies were so boring and spotty that I gave it maybe one or two days before I gave up on trying to continue the conversation.

He was another guy that when I was making my blog reel, I texted him months later to ask how he felt about the date. He texted “when was this and where did we go?”. After providing the date and place he (unsurprisingly) didn’t reply. Decided to take my L on that one.