Date #26 & #27: Bitter Coffee and Bitter Opinions

August 6, 2022

Date #26 was my third first date in a row. But unlike the first two, this one ended right after the date… sort of. He was the first Latino guy I went on a date with since being in the DMV. The plan was to go dancing and idk why I agreed to that because I absolutely hate dancing. I’ve never been the club/party type so I don’t know what it was in me that thought this date idea was a good one. Plus the club isn't the best first date spot to begin with.

It was around 9ish but he said he wanted to get some coffee first before going out dancing so he can wake himself up. I’m not gonna lie coffee that late was… a bit weird to me but I just went with it.

So we met up somewhere in DuPont, a DC neighborhood, stumbling upon closed coffee shops until we found Emissary in NW DC. I’ve always liked the vibe in there but the drinks never hit for me. That day was no different. Since he was getting coffee I wasn’t going to just sit there so I ordered whatever sounded like a safe option which… was not a safe option after all.

The date was very surface level. We talked about what we did for work, him being a High School Spanish teacher. I did become intrigued though when idk how it came up but he said he had a date on Friday, Tuesday and Monday and I told him I had dates Friday, Thursday and Wednesday. One thing that piqued my interest was how openly we could talk about our other dates. But then he lost points when I forgot how it came up but I remember jokingly asking him “do you even know my name?” and he thought for a bit and was like “is it Nia?” But I think from the beginning I knew this wasn’t going anywhere so I didn’t even feel a type of way. We actually laughed about it.

After our nasty coffees, we walked to Cafe Citron, a club in the same area. There they had… idk if it was a salsa lesson or some type of dance class that I wasn’t the best at. It was an awkward time I must say.

We ended the night at City Tap House Dupont which was a chill upscale type of sportsbar in my opinion. I told myself I’d prob wanna go back with better company. Nothing against him but by the end of the night conversation wasn’t it for me. We didn't even order any more drinks or food. We sat quietly for a good while until we decided to dip. I walked with him to his car and I had to call an Uber and it would’ve been nice for him to at least wait til my Uber arrived especially considering how late it was.

By the end of the date we were both on the same page though with how we felt about the date. But unlike the others, he was actually upfront about it. The next day he texted me:

“Hey! I’m sorry I didn’t make sure you got home safe I was just kind of thinking about the date and was wondering if I should text you but I'm gonna be honest I think you are a cool person and really attractive and stuff but I felt like we weren’t that compatible as people in terms of going down a relationship road. But for me I'm still down to just hang out with no expectations if you are into that but if not totally cool! Just wanna be upfront. Had a great time last night!”

I really appreciated this and for that I actually was down to hang out for how honest he was. Not only that but he actually did seem like a cool person, just not a romantic connection like he said. I told him that was all good with me. He then replied “Cool! Amongst all your other dates this week you have any days you could squeeze a hang out in?”

Since then, we have made multiple plans to go to another dance class or just other typical hang outs but with him already living over an hour away, the timing has never worked out. But we do hit each other up every now and then for birthdays or just checking in. Not sure if that hang out will ever happen, but because of his text, he’s good in my book! 

November 2, 2022

I’m not gonna lie I was turned off by Date #27 the minute I met up with him. He was Nigerian and from my own personal experiences with them, I just can’t date Nigerian men. They hold certain traditional values that I just cannot uphold. Perfect example would be Date #27. We went to Alero on U St. All I was trying to do was enjoy my fajitas but he wouldn't let me get past my meal before going on a tangent about how I’m “supposed” to have kids. Being that I don’t want any, I tend to let this be known on the first date and he just could not accept this. He went on with “It’s a part of nature” and “it’s your duty” and I was just trying to find ways to speed the date up quicker. I don’t even remember what happened after that did he take me home? Did I uber? Metro? Really I just try to forget that this one even happened.