Date #20 & #21: Sloppy & Shady

April 2, 2022

This date is what made me realize why the hood dudes had the girlies in a chokehold. This man didn’t do anything specific but it was just his demeanor that had me double taking. If yall read last week's date about how homie was the nerdy type, this guy was the exact opposite. I didn’t get to know him past the first date but from first impressions he had that “bad boy” aura that the girls usually swoon over. He had the thickest DC accent I’ve ever encountered, he had a child, clothes falling off his body, locs unkempt, and his breath smelled. These were the reasons why he wasn’t seeing me again but personality wise he had a very nonchalant attitude so… like I said I could see why the girls would be interested in him but he wasn’t Eboni’s type. 

We went to Po Boy Jim’s, a popular DC spot in NE DC, but to me the food is nothing to go crazy over. We were supposed to have a second date to go bowling but I won’t lie the day we were supposed to go, someone else asked me out on a date that same night so I went with them instead. Don’t ask me who (because I don’t know myself) but just know it was someone I would’ve rather hung out with.

April 7, 2022

#21 was my first non-black date in DC. He was Native American and the best way I could describe him was adorable. I (nor my friends) could see us together as a couple but as an individual he was a cutie. But… he was also in the military. Now I haven’t dated many military men, but from my experiences, they always exhibit some type of off-putting and questionable behaviors (much of what we’ll get into in later dates).

We did date for about two-three months but personality wise I knew we weren’t connecting much. He was the only guy I dated out here that had his own apartment so it was nice to be able to get away from the dorms and just chill in a new space.

We’re jumping the gun here a bit though. Our first date he picked me up after class and we headed to El Centro, a Mexican restaurant in Georgetown. The food wasn’t all that, the drinks were solid, we even tried a new drink together (trying new things together always wins points with me). It was a decent time. On our way back to campus he was talking to me about his dog, and I was telling him I couldn’t wait to meet him. He said I could that night if I wanted. I sat for a bit listening to my gut, and I didn’t get any off vibes so I went with it. We arrived and… his dog was a puppy and teething so was biting everything within reach… including me. Sweet dog but I wanted him to put him up while I was there. I couldn't have him keep playing tug-of-war with my hair.

It was a comfortable time though; he gave me a pair of pajamas and we stayed up til 4 in the morning watching All of Us Are Dead (solid show on Netflix). I don’t even like binging shows so that said something. Yall might be thinking more happened that night but nope… nothing happened between us besides maybe cuddling, not even a kiss.

The kiss came either the next morning or the next time I went over there… I can’t remember which but besides that, things were very lowkey between us (at least on my end). I went over his place a couple of times. At some point he said he wanted me to stay for three days at his apartment before me leaving for India for two months. An odd yet specific amount of time... but I did, and during that time he took me out to a nice Italian dinner, we went out for drinks, grabbed some ridiculously good tacos at Don Taco, walked the waterfront, and the last day we stayed in and got take out.

I enjoyed my time with him but knew it would be short lived. At one point I overlooked a groupchat of his called “Prairie N*ggers”. I asked him the races of all parties involved in this groupchat of his and I know forsure a white guy, an Asian, and I forgot the 4th guy but I know none of these men were black so what was up with the chat name? He explained it was used to be a derogatory term for Native Americans and I’m not sure how true it is but if so… still cause for an eyebrow raise.

May 2022

After I graduated, he helped me move out my dorm, and our last day together we grabbed Rita's and walked around the neighborhood (have I expressed to yall how underrated walks are and any guy down to go for a little walk always warms my heart?) Anywho, within the next few days I did leave for India for internship. We talked here and there, nothing consistent but also nothing I was worried about. One day I asked if he had been out on any dates, completely innocent question as I was dating others and didn’t mind if he was as well. He said he was and that she even pays for his dinners… what was supposed to be a jab at me I guess. Hell, I was happy for him. But then he made some snide comment about how it shows how interested she is in him and something about how I should do the same to show interest? Whatever it was he was definitely comparing us and I’m not in the interest of competing with others so I kindly let him go after that.

May 2024

Fast forward two years later, not too long ago from me writing this post actually, he hit me up on Hinge saying “I remember this outfit” – an outfit I had worn to his place once and was wearing in one of my Hinge pictures. I debated on replying or not, but it seemed like a playful reply, so I matched back and it was very light-hearted conversation until he said he wanted to see if I wanted to start dating again. I told him we could be cool with each other, but how things ended between us I wasn’t interested in going down that road again. We talked about that situation and it seemed to have been a misunderstanding, if you could call it that, as he thought we were playing and after I let it go he never replied back so… if you were truly playing why not make that clear? But I told him I still wasn’t interested in dating but being friends I was fine with. We talked for a few days after that until he randomly cussed me out in my Hinge messages with “f^ck you b!tch a$$ h0e”, then quickly apologized the next morning, clearly a drunken text. But if that’s how you get or how you feel drunk then yea this was a mistake. I never replied and he unmatched us (again). I know next time what to do if he tries to match again another two years from now.